There are a lot of rules when it comes to naming a horse for example no obscenities, you can�t repeat the name of a Triple Crown or Breeders Cup Champion and if a horse is in the hall of fame horse his name is off limits so that forces horse owners to be creative.
Tabasco Cat � The 1994 Belmont stakes winner was as fiery as his name suggestions. Tabasco Cat put the son of trainer D. Wayne Lukas in a coma for several weeks after breaking lose during a training session.The Past 10 yearsBattleship � There was no sinking this horse, Battleship was the only horse to with both the American Grand National and the prestigious British Grand National.Lagnaf � (1978) An acronym for Let�s all get naked�I�ll let you figure out the restCum Rocket (1969)In 1969 there was a horse that raced at Aqueduct called Cunning Stunt, say that 5 times fast.That�s a Silly Name for a HorseRidge Tool Co. Circle 64Blackface Minstrel (1980)1928 � VitoBig Brown � Named after UPS, Big Brown delivered the perfect product placement. UPS contractor Paul Pompa Jr. named his horse after his biggest customer. Now if only Kit Kat candy bars and Bombay Sapphire Gin would name a horse after me.We all know America hasn�t always been so cool to black people but looking back it�s pretty amazing how far the US has come. Here are some actual horses registered through the Jockey Club and the year each was registered. Multiple years means multiple horses were registered under the same name. You can kind of make a case for the horses named before the height of the civil rights movement but for the 3 horses registered after 1975 you just have to shake your head.I hope this dark period in racings history never repeats itself.1908 - ColinGolden Shower (1955)Wrecked Em (1983)Late Great Comedian Bill Hicks was ahead of his time, his comedy was often over the heads of his audience, which would result some grumbling and some heckles from an impatient audience. His answer was simple �Hold on, Hold on the Dick jokes are coming.� So I�ll close with this slide dedicated to the dick jokes of the horseracing world. Here are some of the most risqu�, sexually suggestive and down right dirty horse names from the past 150 years.Darkie (1950)Jungle Bunny (1953)War Admiral � Sired by Man o�War, War Admiral was the winner in 21 of his 26 starts with 3 places and a show, the only race the Admiral lost was his 1938 match race against Seabiscuit but on the bright side we all got a fantastic movie because of it.The most egregious example of this lax registration finished 3rd place in the 1911 Preakness Stakes. Well let�s just say the name rhymes with bigger and is used frequently by Chris Rock and Dr. Dre.Funny Cide � The 2003 Derby winners name is a play on his fathers name Distorted Humor and his mothers Belle�s Good Cide. But to me the name Funny Cide sounds like a Superman villain some sort of Bizarro World version of Jack Kevorkian.Stay Gold,Ryobi Technologies, Inc. Circle 63Nutzapper � Nutzapper was the name given to Andy Hillis� gelding horse until the Jockey Club figured out the name had nothing to do with cooking chestnuts in oil. The horse is currently named Awaiting Justice.When I made my selections I asked myself does this name make me smile. Does the name create a powerful image in my mind? Can I say this name in front of my mother without feeling awkward? Let�s have a look.Blow Me (1945)And finally I�ll close with two of the best.The entertainment industry and the horseracing industry often go hand in hand. Several horses take their name from their celebrity owners or big movie productions and Hollywood, always looking for a good story, will produce a blockbuster featuring one of these famous thoroughbreds. Please note Bobcat Goldthwait vehicle Hot to Trot doesn�t fall into either the blockbuster or the famous thoroughbred category.And of course the Youtube sensation Hoof Hearted.8. The CS5 circular saw from Bosch Power Tools is built around a left-side blade configuration for a high level of visibility and cutting accuracy, the manufacturer says. With a 15-amp motor that delivers 6,200 rpm, the saw quickly cuts 3/4-in. plywood and other dense materials. It also has a 56-degree bevel capacity. An anti-snag lower guard enables the saw to progress smoothly through thinner materials.Uncle Tom (1950),Bosch Power Tools. Circle 70Pharlap � The Australian Wonder Horse was the subject of a fascinating movie 1983 movie bearing his name. The horse was too good; winning 37 of 51 races entered but being so good Phar Lap made some enemies. Just three days before the 1930 Melbourne cup, gangsters tried to assassinate the horse. Phar Lap survived this attempt on his life, won the Cup with the shortest odds (8/11) ever.12. The Festool OF 2200 plunge router features a 2,200-watt, 3-1/2 hp motor coupled with MMC electronics to increases the feed rate and reduce stalling, the manufacturer says. Fingertip controls, angled grips and a 30-degree offset base make the router easy to handle and maneuver. It features macro and micro depth and lateral adjustments to 1/10mm (1/256 in.) and double column clamping that eliminates head wobble.Let�s have a look at a couple alcohol inspired names1876 - ShirleyThe Preakness Stake had a couple champions named after my aunt and uncle.Man o'War � Man o�War won every race but one. Who was the only horse to beat the legend? The horse that beat him was named �Upset� and thus popularized the term for an underdog victory.3. Skil's 2510-02 14.4-volt compact drill/driver features a variable speed of 0 to 800 rpm, a 15 1 position clutch, a keyless 3/8-in. chuck, visual forward/reverse indicators, a built-in work light, and a soft-grip handle. The on-tool battery fuel gauge lets users know when the battery needs to be recharged, and the charging system automatically provides temperature and overcharge protection.2. This compact 12-volt lithium-ion drill/driver from Ridgid features a compact design and an LED light to illuminate work areas. Other features of the R82007 include: an integrated clutch and chuck; an 18-position clutch; a 3/8-in. single-sleeve chuck that takes 1/4-in. hex and conventional round bits; a cartridge style battery; and a fast charger that recharges in 30 minutes.Tar Baby (1944, 1975, and 1985)Paslode. Circle 66Skil-Bosch Power Tool Co. Circle 65Everyday in the sporting world we use the analogies of war and horseracing is no different, here are some horses I would have gladly rode into battle.The Belmont Stakes has a history of crushing the dreams of Triple Crown hopefuls with 20 horses, including last years Big Brown, winning both the Kentucky Derby and the Preakness stakes before succumbing to the Belmont. During the early years, the Belmont also had a strange run of winners with odd names, well odd for thoroughbred horses.Rory Gold.Date More Minors (1998)The Jockey Club has definitely tightened up what they consider acceptable thoroughbred names so the past ten years are not nearly as colorful as the 100 plus years before. Here are a few of the best horse names of the past 10 years.9. Rotozip's DR1 drywall router weighs in at 2.8 lbs., measures 7.5 in. long, and runs at 33,000 rpm. It also features an on-tool wrench storage compartment, replaceable motor brushes to reduce downtime, vents designed to keep dust away from the eyes, a redesigned depth guide allowing for maximum visibility and a hardened-steel lock pin.The Kid Stays in the PictureI�ve scoured the Internet; I�ve called some of the oldest horse handicappers I know looking for the best, the coolest, the most suggestive and downright questionable names we could come up with.Stevie Wonderboy � Owner Merv Griffin said of his horse, �My horse isn�t blind he just wears big sunglasses.Bodacious Tatas (1985)Afternoon Deelites � We all know what afternoon deelites are and being owned by ultra-smooth composer Burt Bacharach, makes this horse so much cooler.4. Paslode's CF-325 cordless framing nailer features a newly designed nosepiece that is more aggressive than its predecessor and redesigned "no-step" fuel canisters that eliminate the preuse snapping, twisting and aligning required by previous models. The new fuel is guaranteed to deliver at least 1,200 drives and offer an 18-month life. In addition, CF-325 can go five times longer (50,000 drives) between recommended cleanings, the manufacturer says.Just Really Cool Names11. Simpson Strong-Tie auto-feed screw driving system for standing-seam metal roofing is said to cut fastener installation time in half. The Precision Placement Quik Drive System is specifically designed to drive fasteners into the pre-existing hole of a standing seam clip and in close proximity to the clip bend without interference by the tool. The tools attachment works with most brands of screw guns.1875 - CalvinSimpson Strong-Tie. Circle 75
Rory Gold.
Author: Rory Gold
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